My mom says so. Although I had a big head, I didn't hear it at first. They pulled me out with a forceps, but I was left with a hole in my head. I now wear a beret to keep the ladybugs out. I ran out of gas when I was crossing the Alps in a balloon, the boiling water pipe burst when I was on eavesdropping on my neighboursand the water heater hose burst on the night of the Resurrection.Yesterday I wanted to kill myself, but when I jumped off the bridge a boat appeared. I'm still alive. Watch out, my mother is calling; I know what she'll say.

(Translated by Cristina Ioana Bontea / University of Bucharest, Faculty of Foreign Languages and Literatures, MTTLC, year I / Corrected by prof. dr. Nadina Vișan / Edited by Silvia Petrescu, coordinator of the translations)

Real Fiction is a collective project started in 2013 by Florin Piersic Jr. The concept of Real Fiction continued to exist as a Facebook group, after a volume of stories was published at Humanitas Publishing House. (In November 2022, the group has 9,580 members.) The authors write ultra-short stories, with the texts limited to 500 characters (in Romanian, so the length of the English translation might be a little different) - a flash-fiction exercise on a topic that changes every few days. The group's coordinators are Florin Piersic Jr., Gabriel Molnar, Răzvan Penescu, and Luchian Abel. (Drawing by Adrian T. Roman)

Versiunea în română a acestui text se poate citi aici, în rubrica Ficțiuni Reale.

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